September 10, 2000
Dear brothers and sisters,
During our last meeting I tabled the letter to Rama
our Australian Central Coordinator about the Nexus article with the testimonies
from ex devotees.
Firstly, I am interested to know if everyone read my
letter? (From what I could ascertain - out of the 10 people present 3 had read
the letter to Ramamanathan the Central Coordinator).
Who has read the Nexus article? (Only two had read
this article that was freely available in newsagents - not a good sign of
responsible leadership).
Please could the results be tabled? (They probably
were)
How many of you have read 'The Findings' by ex
devotee David Bailey? (Things were happening pretty quickly but from what I
could gather only two members had looked at this).
I went on:
Without having done so, (reading "The
Findings" material) I don't believe it is possible to understand what on
earth I am talking about.
I certainly didn't have a clue, until my eyes were
prized open by the heartfelt testimony of these brave ex-devotees who have told
the truth about their experiences of sexual abuse in the privacy of the
interview room.
As of last month I had not sought out any ex-devotee
or read anything on the various web pages devoted to either putting down Swami
or upholding his status. I had thought the whole thing to be a 'media beat up'
and 'sob story', designed to suck in the unwary. A process that we had been
told by Swami would happen - a "sorting of the wheat from the chaff".
You can if you like put me in the chaff bag today.
However I will provide good satvic roughage, if you
will hear me out fairly, without applying the gag - either physically or
mentally. (At this point I made a sarcastic aside referring to the effort made
to silence me from even reading the letter - I was not proud of myself for this
- it aggravated the life out of the two most unreasonable members and set a
more confrontational atmosphere).
My request for an internal inquiry into the
allegations seemed reasonable. Something I would have though standard practice
in an organization with such a high moral code. Any group that denies the
process of investigation of the alleged misconduct of one of it leader is an
organization that falls quickly into the category of 'irregular' or even 'cult
like'.
So, "what to do"?
I had no where to go, other than to carry out my own
investigation by whatever means available. · I have read the testimonies on the
so called "gossip" web sites. · I have spent time on the 'positive'
internet sites designed to undermine the authenticity of the unfavorable
testimonies. · I have spoken on the telephone to ex-devotees who were kissed
passionately on the mouth and were asked to perform oral sex on Swami.
I have also spoken to three parents who have sons who
have been asked to give gross sexual favours to Swami. These people are quite
sane and quite clear that these events have happened to their sons. There are
now many reports flooding in. It is understandable that young men have held
this information within, in the same way as those who were abused as a child by
priests relations and parents have taken half a lifetime to come out and speak
about it and eventually be healed. Some of these young people have been through
suicidal episodes. One pattern is clear they were all told by Swami not to tell
their parents.
It seems there are many of the Sai Organizations
leaders who know that this has been going on for years. Some say "the
Avatar is God he can do whatever he likes".
This doesn't wash with me.
Under the self proclaimed title of "Avatar"
it seems that Sai Baba may have impunity to do whatever he likes. It is
possible that this behavior has been going on throughout his adult life and
continues as we speak together this morning. ( I had to raised my voice above
the voices of protest. There was a certain drama in the air - with the quiet
drone of chanting emanating from one of the members)
Reports from older ex-devotees who were at the Ashram
with Howard Murphet in the sixties are apparently now becoming available. These
ex-devotees are now 'coming out' admitting to the dark side of their
relationship with Sai Baba. The stories related to the 'shadow side' of this
undoubtedly extraordinary person, who we devotees thought to be "of the
Light", is now coming out.
Apparently it is almost common knowledge amongst
students at his colleges, that 'his favorites' have many such sexually oriented
'interviews'.
I could go on and on with pages of this stuff.
However it is hard and unpleasant to read and just as
awful to listen to. At the least, I am saying is that there are serious
allegations that need to be evaluated internally.
The Central Coordinator and the Deputy Central
Coordinator seek to put all this to one side saying. "If you have a
problem take Swami to court!." They say. This has and will be tried,
however Swami is in India and we all know about Indian corruption and the
connections Swami has in high places.
Here we are as office bearers, in insignificant
Adelaide, sitting on information that could be having the impact of Jonestown
in its own way. For us as office bearers to have any self respect we must I
believe make an internal investigation.
It seems our leaders may be either too 'brainwashed'
to even consider the reports, or too weak and afraid of the awful truth to
delve beneath the surface. (this statement really set the cat amongst the
pigeons - I had to raise my voice above the outcry)
I believe we, as the South Australian Organization
should have the courage to follow truth where ever it takes us. Only by using
our discrimination and moral conscience, will we make our way through this
saga. It is a lonely road by ones self. Together we may be able to make sense
of it.
I have written extensively on my process - it may be
helpful to others. I will send my understandings upon request - by email or
fax. I believe we have a 'spiritual crisis' on our hands and that this issue
falls clearly within my portfolio as Spiritual Coordinator of South Australia.
For all these reasons and many more that go beyond the time available, I
propose that the South Australian Sai Organization set up a "Truth Seeking
" committee to examine the allegations and hopefully to disprove the
claims against our Founder.
There is nothing more that I would like to see this
'phase' of mine over and to become a devotee again. However this can no longer
be from the point of 'blindness' from which our leaders wish us to operate.
The truth will out eventually, we may as well play
our part by engaging in the process of finding it for ourselves, sooner rather
than later - however distasteful. Your Faith in God can only be strengthened by
truth.
For this purpose I will be continuing as the
Spiritual Coordinator for South Australia and continuing to uphold the
spiritual principles that have been given by our Founder. Particularly.
"Members shall live an exemplary life". Is Sai Baba an embodiment of
his often repeated statement "My Life is My Message"? That is the key
question we will address on this committee, if we have the guts to form it.
This couple of paragraphs were a twist. The two key
'cult controllers' were using words like "absurd" and
"ridiculous" almost exploding with a strange sort of wide eyed rage.
They had all expected a resignation! However I had placed a motion on the table
for the formation of a committee that then needed to be handled. I admit that
for the rest of the meeting I was a bit of a pain. I knew they would sack me.
Which they promptly did. However I wanted to make it hard for them - which I
also did.
I stayed on at the meeting making comments
occasionally about aspects of general business that seemed to be irrelevant,
when compared to the issues I had raised. This would have been hard for the
reasonable Chairperson. Although I explained to the group that I was being
disruptive in the same spirit as the Greenpeace activists, I was, on reflection
going to far and as a result I alienated some of the more reasonable members.
This is a pity - I put it down to the adrenaline rush
that can come when we create a living drama - I would have been much more
effective if I could have simply ' held my peace' at the eye of the storm. The
state of mind I was in was that of 'The Crusader'. I almost wanted to be asked
to leave. I would have refused and asked them to carry me out. It never got to
that.
The meeting finished with a somewhat healing chat
with some of the members. A motion to the effect that I can present my findings
to the group was accepted. Whether anyone would read it or not is another
matter. However I was able to make my point before being ousted.
Other members will look at this issue in their own
time. I believe all those whose 'moral conscience' rises above 'blind faith'
will eventually evaluate the actions of Sai Baba. There is clarity to be found
in the multiple testimony of the ex-devotees. None of whom wanted to believe
that this was true - until it happened to them or their sons.
Stephen Carthew, Ex- Spiritual Coordinator South
Australia